Happy Anniversary to Me (& the Hubby!)

 7 years ago today the Hubby and I said "I Do"!

As I sit and think about it - it's hard to believe that 7 years

have passed since that wonderful day.

We had an amazing wedding day -

surrounded by lots family, friends, happiness and love.

Our wedding took place in NY (where I was born & raised) and we were so lucky to have so many people come in from all over to share in our special day. It was truly my dream wedding and there wasn't one thing that I would do differently.

The best part of that day was that it marked the beginning of a new journey for us.

The past 7 years have been an amazing part of my life. I am not saying that every day has been smooth sailing.  I would be lying to you if I said that but, our ups & downs, disagreements and bad days have made our relationship stronger.

We may take a few hits - but we always come out on top! :)

I look at our Lil Divas and I see what our love has created.  I wouldn't change a thing.

This is our life, our love, our happily ever after.... or as close as we can get to that :)

I love you Honey and I am looking forward to sharing the next 70+ years together (if we can be that lucky!)

Wordless Wednesday - My Heart, My Love - My Husband

Today's Wordless Wednesday picture is of me & my hubby! We rarely take pictures together since I am often the one behind the camera so this picture was a rare treat for us! Since you always get to see our Lil Divas I thought it would be nice to show you the Mom & Dad behind the Posh Lil Divas today! :)

I Am NOT Perfect

There are moments when you are forced to really take a look at yourself or for a moment see yourself  through another's eyes (in this case my husband).  I had such a moment today and it left me shaken by how utterly unperfect I am. It's funny how a few words can do that to you. Why did it shake me to my very core? Because, in all honesty I try to do my best. I try to make everyone happy. I try to be there for my family - to fulfill their needs and yes, even their wants. So it hurts when you are hit with such undeniable failure at the very thing that you strive for. 

It made me think about all my shortcomings and I am saddened by how long the list is.

1. I am NOT a perfect mother. There are so many ways in which I fail on a daily basis at being a mom that I can only hope and pray that the good far outweighs the bad.  That when my girls are grown and look back at their childhood they will remember it fondly and forgive my many failures and shortcomings. That they will not hold against me the many times I became frustrated or angry and yelled (way more often than I care to admit). I hope they don't dwell on all the times I was too busy (or simply did not want to) play. I hope they do not recall all the things that were said in frustration that I later wish I hadn't said. I hope they never realize the moments when I was longing for peace and quiet and some time alone when all they wanted was to be with me because above all things I may not be a perfect mom but I love them fiercely . Even on my worst days I wouldn't give up being being their mom for a second.  I wouldn't trade all the joy and love that it has brought into my life. I can only hope that above all my imperfections and mistakes, they can feel my love and may that be what they recall when they think of me.

2. I am NOT a perfect wife. I do not rush to greet my husband after a long day of work. Rather, I often forget to even ask him about his day as I struggle to make dinner or fight with my girls to eat. My husband works alot and many times we speak more on the phone than in person. Yet, I do not drop everything when he is home. I often take for granted that he is an adult and will understand that there are other things I need or even want to do. As a mom - we do not get time to ourselves until everyone is asleep. I can be selfish about this time.  It's unfair. I know that. Yet, I also need that time to simply unwind. Time where I am not catering to anyone else's needs - I do that all day.  It's exhausting. I know he feels that I put his needs last but that is not my intention. I just need some time where I put me first for a change. It seems that somewhere along the way of becoming a wife and mother - being just "me" has gotten lost. I have not figured out a way to balance everything. While my husband may feel that I put him last - I feel like I am overlooked. I am not a perfect wife but I love my husband. Marriage isn't easy, and being married with children is downright hard. I by no means have it figured out and I honestly wonder if I'll ever get it right.

3. I am NOT a perfect daughter. I love my parents deeply. Since becoming a mom I see things through a different set of eyes. My parents were not perfect but I accept that they did their best. They were married young and I honestly don't know how they did it all.  They worked hard to give my brother and I good experiences growing up. They tried to make us happy . They were strict - but I always knew they loved me. Yet, days (and sometimes weeks) go by and I get caught up with my life and I do not reach out. Then, I will get a call and they will remind me that I have fallen short & I feel guilty. It's so easy to get wrapped up in my own everyday and forget about everyone else but I don't want to be that daughter. I think about a time when I will not be my daughters' world and it pains me. It pains me to think that one day they will feel too busy to simply call and say hello. I hate that I am that daughter to my own parents. I hope they always know how much I love them even when I fail to show it.

4. I am NOT a perfect sister. My brother lives close by and there are sometimes many weeks when we do not see each other or even speak to each other aside from the occasional text. It's sad because we grew up in such a close knit family. We were always surrounded by aunts, uncles and cousins. I want my girls to know what that feels like. I love my niece and I want for her and my girls to grow up as close as my cousins did. I am failing miserably at it and it makes me sad. I have such a deep bond with my own aunts that I always dreamed I would be the same way when I became an aunt. I'm not.

5. I am NOT a perfect friend. I am the friend that rarely calls, returns calls, etc. I wasn't always that way. I used to be the friend that everyone turned to because they knew I would listen no matter what. Now, I find that I am the last to know things, the one least turned to. It hurts but I can only blame myself.

I find that wearing so many hats is hard. Being everything to everyone is impossible and I am quite obviously  falling short in all areas. How do we find that magical balance that keeps everyone happy? How do we find a way to be a good wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend? How do we find a way to keep everyone happy and still find time for ourselves in all of this? I really wish I knew because right now I feel like I am not making anyone happy and it's a hard pill to swallow.

Bern

Wordless Wednesday - Daddy's Lil Girl

10 Reasons Why My Hubby is AMAZING!

With Valentine's Day just around the corner (or week!) it's the perfect time to be a little mushy and emotional. With two Lil Divas and a busy daily life - I definitely do not make the time to be as mushy as I should when it comes to my amazing hubby!

I go on and on about my Lil Divas on this blog so I thought I would give the hubby a post all his own & even make it a flattering one too!

Aren't I just the best, most awesomely special wife out there? Yes, I am - I know! He knows it too! :)

So here it goes - a la Lettermen Style:

The Top 10 Reasons Why My Hubby is Amazing:

10. He is intelligent. He proved this beyond a shadow of a doubt when he made the wise decision to marry ME! :)

9. He is hardworking. He works 18+hr days/nights so that I can be a SAHM to our girls. He goes with little to no sleep but never shucks his responsibilites either at work or at home.

8. He is loyal. I love and respect that he would never turn his back on those he loves.

7. He is honest. He calls it as he sees it and is not phony. Sometimes this makes me angry and makes us clash but I respect him for his honesty even if I don't always agree with him.

6. He is Tidy - seriously this has to be mentioned bc if truth be told - he is much neater and tidier than I am. The man sweeps and mops every night! I HATE those chores & love that he has a compulsion to do them!

5. He is Easy Going. He is not high maintenance. He does not ask for or require much and he is never commanding or overbearing. He might complain about things from time to time but for the most part he is very patient, flexible and understanding of what I need or want to do. At times I know this is a task! I am not the easiest person in the world - I acknowledge & accept that about myself, lol!

4. He is tall, dark & handsome! Seriously he is over 6ft tall, has dark hair/eyes & is pretty easy on the eyes! It's what first attracted me to him - let's be honest! I am seriously blessed that what's on the inside is even better than the package on the outside!

3. He is Fun. He is always ready to do something, never shying away from one of my ideas or a family adventure. We are always on the go and creating wonderful memories as a family. I love this about us!

2. He honestly and truly loves me and accepts me for who I am - faults and flaws and all! Honestly, what more can you ask for in a partner? He knows the good, the bad, and the oh so ugly and loves me anyway! I have never doubted his love for me and he always shows it - even when I forget to at times.

1. He is an awesome Daddy! He is a hands-on dad! He helps with the daily care of the girls when he is home.  He is an active part of their everyday life. He watches them when I have to work on his days off and will go without sleep and sacrifice whatever it takes to make them happy or be there for a special event. I could not ask for a better Daddy for my girls and it makes me fall in love with him all over again everytime I see him with them.

I love you Honey - Today, Tomorrow & Always!

You are an Amazing Husband & Father.  I hope you always know & feel how much you TRULY mean to me even when I fail to show it as much as I should.

XOXOXO

Love,
Me